Scream!

The good kind. I'm buzzing on the inside (like a bee)! Oh, I'm so excited! Camping with my wonderful, crazy friends! Someone I thought was disappearing isn't! What to do, what to do... I do want to do an internship in Brooklyn... I can't imagine it would be possible before the fall. who knows? Live in New York City, bunking with my brother. We are positively insane! But I love him for being so generous. It's going to be so hot this weekend. I'm actually glad. Better than too cold, which it was last year. Overcast, windy, cold. I'll get some good sun! feel like a little girl again. I'm going out with Ryan tonight! I love Ryan. Atleast, I hope it works out, I think he was probably a little drunk when he told me to call him. His girlfriend seemed a bit apprehensive about me. No worries, just an old family friend.

My skirt keeps crawling up my waist. Annoying. Parul needed a jump today. I love our little battery jumper, but I realize I have very little idea how to use it. We kept activating the horn. Kinda freaky. I commandeered a passing man to show us how to properly jump a car. Hopefully I'll remember now. I hate being stereotypical in that sort of a way.

I feel like I have a caffeine high. Which, incidentally, I never have. I've had to make myself focus periodically today. Started disappearing when I had patrons. Eek. That never works out.

I picked up some Edith Wharton books. I really enjoy her writing. King Lear is interesting, some things about it annoy me. The Fool says nuncle way too much and Edgar doesn't shutup about the foul fiend. Oy. I guess I'm kind of waiting for things to develop. I wanted to read it because of what John Brenner said about when Cordelia dies and Lear howls three times. So intense. Shakespeare is so intense. The human drama and the poetry! I keep catching Twelfth Night on tv. Still haven't seen the very beginning, so I need to catch it again. As strange as this sounds I really enjoy the mixed up sexual identity stuff, the turmoil and the tension. The woman disguised as a male soldier, in love with her Captain, the night in the barn listening to the melancholy song of the beggar, on the verge of a kiss because they know they both love each other. In that time there was _no_ shame in openly loving someone of the same sex, not romantically, but still intensely. I think it's beautiful! Love! Also it seemed people had no problem expressing love even when it wasn't returned. I think we tend to be ashamed to love without reciprocation now.

Something else that I think is wonderful is the seen in Room with a View when the romantic boy (can't remember his name) is clinging to the branches of a tree hanging over a hill in the Italian country side screaming "Love! Beauty!" and other things like that. It is apparently a catholic thing, but I think it's great!