leaving...

This is it! My final day at the New School as a temp for Student Services. I bought pretty bright tulips for Anna. Such a small way to say thanks for the irreplaceable help that she has been to me in this position. Without Anna I would have floundered. She bought goodbye bagels for all the girls up front on Tuesday (which was the day I originally thought I was leaving). I don't really want to make something of leaving. I feel like I'd just like to say goodbye like I do after every shift and head home. Karen bought me a HUGE box of cookies, yum.

I had to replace my metrocard yesterday. So for that day I had two cards on me, a dead one and an active card. I took out, last night, the one I thought was dead; but when I ran my metro card this morning I got that unholy message "insufficient fare". I froze for a minute unsure what I wanted to do...walk back to the apartment and get the right card? That would add ten minutes at least to my commute. Or buy a single ride? It's frustrating, but I went with the single ride. Frustrating because after getting an unlimited pass I realized my next two months will probably be spent commuting in a zipcar to western NY. And then I further fail to take advantage of my unlimited pass by bringing along the dead one. Growl!

I'm a little split about how to handle after work. I need to redeposit the cash I took out for rent (because I learned the boys do it in check form and mail it) and I will have frozen veggie patties and open condiments on me and the bank closes at 6. I will be going to the bank, it's JUST around the corner from my subway stop, and the traffic could potentially be low. It was low yesterday, but it was also quite drizzly...

I want to pick up a book my father recommended by Umberto Eco, In the Name of the Rose, so I can read it to Jeff. I was originally going to read his On the Island of the Day Before, but when my father saw that on my shelf he informed me that it was the most boring book he'd ever read.

I've cleaned up my area so it looks more like it did when Thelma left. I'm debating about undoing some of the minor shifts I made to better accomodate my own frequent operations. I should put it all back how she had it.

When my life seems hectic and full of things that need to be done, pressing obligations, I tend to say in my head "work through them, get them done, it will be over and I will feel peaceful again and rest." But there are times when I realize that that day is still rather far off, far enough that I can't see it yet. And I wonder how I can slip rest and peace in little pockets to myself to pass through these phases more easily and to not become overwhelmed. A quiet voice tells me I have over committed myself, or that maybe I need to communicate better just how much time I really need to get certain things done. I suspect a better rationing of my time to the different things I have taken on would help, but I am not so good at that and have not made much of an effort in that direction. It is hard for me to be egalitarian with my projects. I tend to go off of how I feel, I work on what _feel_ like working on. (I was going to italicize the word feel but it's coming up in html format- or something- and I can see it posting just like that.) It's 4:45, so little left to my final day. What do I do!